Overcoming Social Anxiety & Finding Your Voice
Have you ever felt like the world is watching your every move, waiting for you to mess up? That sinking feeling when your heart pounds, your palms sweat, and your mind races—desperate to find the “right” words, yet stuck in silence?
If that sounds familiar, I want you to know something: You are not broken. You are not alone.
I’m a Clinical Psychotherapist in Adelaide, and I’ve dedicated my work to helping people just like you—people who are tired of social anxiety stealing their confidence, their opportunities, and their joy.
I offer in-person sessions in Adelaide as well as psychotherapy online consultations, giving you the flexibility to choose what feels best. Through a mix of powerful therapies—including CBT, Polyvagal Therapy, ACT, NLP, Suggestion Therapy, and Narrative Therapy—we’ll work together to untangle the fear, rebuild confidence, and create real, lasting change.
Oh, and here’s the part my clients love: I provide customised NLP MP3 recordings after sessions. These aren’t just generic meditations—each one is tailored to reinforce your personal breakthroughs, helping you solidify progress between sessions.
If you’re looking for a counsellor for social anxiety who understands what you’re going through, you’ve found one.
What Is Social Anxiety Disorder (And Why Does It Feel So Powerful?)
Social Anxiety Disorder isn’t just about being “shy.” It’s a deep, overwhelming fear that makes social situations feel like a battleground. It can make simple things—like making a phone call, speaking in a meeting, or ordering at a café—feel exhausting.
Common Social Anxiety Disorder Symptoms:
- That constant, nagging fear of being judged or embarrassing yourself
- Overthinking conversations before, during, and after they happen
- Feeling physically sick at the thought of social interactions
- Avoiding eye contact, group settings, or speaking up
- An inner critic that never stops telling you you’re “not enough”
Sound familiar? It’s not just in your head—it’s in your nervous system.
What Situations Can Act Like Social Anxiety Triggers ?
Ever noticed that some situations send your anxiety skyrocketing, while others don’t? That’s because social anxiety has specific anxiety triggers, such as:
- Public speaking (even introducing yourself in a group!)
- Meeting new people or being put on the spot
- Feeling watched while eating, drinking, or working
- Making phone calls or sending messages
- Being the centre of attention (even for something good!)
Your brain has learned to see these moments as threats, and that’s where therapy comes in—to retrain your mind and body so they don’t overreact.
How Therapy Can Help You Reclaim Your Confidence
Working with a therapist isn’t about forcing yourself into uncomfortable situations. It’s about understanding your fear, rewiring your reactions, and building confidence at your own pace.
With the right support, you can:
✅ Challenge negative thought patterns so they lose their power
✅ Develop coping techniques for when anxiety strikes
✅ Gradually face social situations with confidence (no pressure, no rush!)
✅ Use mindfulness & relaxation techniques to calm your nervous system
✅ Rewrite your inner dialogue—because that inner critic doesn’t tell the truth
A psychologist for social anxiety might focus solely on cognitive approaches, but my therapy style is holistic, personalised, and designed for deep transformation.
Why My Approach Is Different
There’s no one-size-fits-all fix for social anxiety. That’s why I blend multiple therapeutic methods, including:
🧠 CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) – Breaking negative thought loops
💙 Polyvagal Therapy – Calming your nervous system’s fight-or-flight response
🌿 ACT (Acceptance & Commitment Therapy) – Letting go of self-judgment
🗣 Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) – Rewiring your brain for confidence
📖 Narrative Therapy – Changing the way you see your own story
And, of course, my custom NLP MP3 recordings reinforce what we work on in therapy, so you continue making progress between sessions.
If your social anxiety is linked to past trauma, working with a trauma therapist can be an essential part of your healing journey.
FAQs: Let’s Clear Up Some Common Questions
When it comes to Social Anxiety Disorder, I know how many questions can swirl through your mind—about symptoms, treatment, and whether therapy will really work for you. Below, I’ve answered some of the most common questions I hear in my practice.
What’s the difference between a counsellor for social anxiety and a psychologist for social anxiety?
A counsellor for social anxiety focuses on therapy, coping strategies, and emotional support, while a psychologist for social anxiety may include clinical assessments and diagnoses. My focus is on practical, actionable therapy that helps you move forward.
Can social anxiety be cured?
While there’s no instant “off switch,” therapy can dramatically reduce symptoms. Many of my clients see life-changing improvements, going from avoiding social situations to actively enjoying them.
How long does therapy take?
There’s no set timeline because everyone is different. Some people see shifts within a few sessions, while others prefer longer-term support. My goal is to give you tools that last a lifetime.
What if I’m too anxious to start therapy?
That’s completely normal! If coming in person feels overwhelming, online anxiety treatment lets you start in a way that feels safe and comfortable.
Does CBT help with social anxiety and depression?
Yes! CBT for depression is often used alongside social anxiety treatment, as the two can be deeply connected.
Take the First Step with a Social Anxiety Therapist
It might feel like it right now, but it doesn’t have to control your life. Imagine feeling comfortable in conversations, speaking up with ease, and actually enjoying social situations. That’s possible—and it starts here.
📩 Book a therapist online (online or in Adelaide) and let’s start making those changes—together.
What causes Social Anxiety Disorder?
It doesn’t have one single cause. It often develops due to a mix of:
- Genetics: If social anxiety runs in your family, you may be more prone to it.
- Brain chemistry: Some studies suggest that an overactive amygdala (the part of the brain that processes fear) may contribute to heightened anxiety in social settings.
- Life experiences: Childhood bullying, critical parenting, or past humiliating social experiences can shape your response to social situations.
- Cognitive patterns: Negative thought loops and excessive self-criticism reinforce social anxiety over time.
The good news? No matter the cause, therapy can help you break free from fear and reclaim control.
Can therapy really help, or am I just “wired this way”?
This is one of the biggest myths I hear! Yes, social anxiety feels ingrained, but that doesn’t mean it’s unchangeable. The brain is neuroplastic, meaning it can rewire itself. With the right therapy—such as CBT, NLP, and Polyvagal Therapy—you can train your mind and nervous system to respond differently to social situations.
This is where CBT for anxiety shines. It helps you challenge unhelpful beliefs, shift negative thought patterns, and create new, empowering responses to social situations. Learn more about CBT for anxiety here.
How do I know if I need professional help?
Many people feel nervous in certain situations, like giving a speech or going on a first date. But if social anxiety is holding you back from opportunities, relationships, or daily activities, it may be time to seek help.
Some signs that therapy could benefit you include:
- Avoiding social situations to the point of isolation
- Intense fear of being judged or embarrassed, even in casual interactions
- Overanalyzing social encounters before and after they happen
- Feeling physically sick (nausea, dizziness, sweating) in social settings
- Struggling with work, school, or relationships due to anxiety
Is social anxiety linked to other mental health conditions?
Yes! Social Anxiety Disorder often overlaps with other mental health concerns, including:
- Depression – Many people with social anxiety also struggle with low mood and self-esteem. Therapy for CBT for depression can help.
- Generalised Anxiety Disorder (GAD) – Excessive worry about a range of situations, not just social ones.
- Panic Disorder – Some people with social anxiety experience full-blown panic disorder, where anxiety escalates into severe panic attacks.
- PTSD – Past trauma can contribute to social anxiety.
Addressing underlying conditions is key to overcoming social anxiety long-term.
What are some self-help strategies for managing social anxiety?
While therapy is incredibly effective, there are also things you can do daily to reduce social anxiety:
✅ Challenge negative thoughts – Ask yourself: “What’s the worst that could happen? And is that really likely?”
✅ Practice deep breathing – Slow, intentional breathing calms the nervous system before social situations.
✅ Use gradual exposure – Start small and work your way up. If speaking to a group feels impossible, begin by making eye contact and smiling at strangers.
✅ Engage in relaxation techniques – Meditation, yoga, and grounding exercises can help regulate anxiety.
✅ Seek professional help when needed – If self-help tools aren’t enough, a therapist can provide targeted support and proven strategies.
If anger and frustration often accompany your social anxiety, you may benefit from counselling for anger management.
Can social anxiety affect sleep?
Absolutely. Many people with social anxiety experience racing thoughts at night, making it difficult to fall asleep. If this sounds familiar, you might want to explore insomnia treatment as part of your therapy plan.
What role does gut health play in social anxiety?
Emerging research suggests a strong link between gut health and mental well-being. People with Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS) often experience increased social anxiety, especially if their symptoms are unpredictable in public settings. If digestive issues contribute to your anxiety, IBS online therapy could be an effective treatment option.
Is online therapy effective for social anxiety?
Yes! In fact, many people with social anxiety feel more comfortable starting therapy from home before transitioning to in-person sessions. Online anxiety treatment provides the same evidence-based strategies, but in a way that feels safe and accessible.
Additional Resources
For more information and self-help strategies, check out this Beyond Blue guide on social anxiety:
👉 Beyond Blue: Social Anxiety Explained
Take the First Step Toward Confidence & Connection
Ready to move past social anxiety and start living with confidence? Let’s take that first step together. Book your initial consultation today, and we’ll create a plan tailored to your needs—whether in person at my Payneham, South Australia office (with easy off-street parking) or online via Zoom from the comfort of your home.
Your journey to a more connected, fulfilling life starts here.
Expanding the Discussion
1. How does stress impact social anxiety?
Stress and social anxiety are deeply connected. When you experience chronic stress, your body stays in fight-or-flight mode, making social interactions feel even more overwhelming. High cortisol levels can also increase overthinking, self-doubt, and avoidance behaviors.
✅ Solution: Learning to manage stress through breathing exercises, mindfulness, and relaxation techniques can significantly ease social anxiety symptoms. If stress feels unmanageable, seeking stress management therapy can provide targeted support.
2. Can emotional dysregulation make social anxiety worse?
Yes! Many people with social anxiety experience strong emotional reactions that feel impossible to control—whether it’s intense fear, frustration, or even shutting down completely in social situations.
✅ Solution: Emotional regulation techniques, such as CBT and mindfulness, help regain control over these responses. Therapy focused on CBT for emotional dysregulation can be particularly effective.
3. Why do I overthink social interactions at night?
Racing thoughts before bed are common for those with social anxiety. The brain replays conversations, analyzes every detail, and imagines worst-case scenarios, making it hard to sleep.
✅ Solution: Establish a nighttime routine that includes journaling, meditation, and limiting screen time before bed. If overthinking is seriously affecting sleep, insomnia treatment can help address underlying anxiety patterns.
4. How does tinnitus affect social anxiety?
For those who experience tinnitus (ringing in the ears), social situations can feel even more exhausting. The constant noise can make it harder to focus on conversations, increasing self-consciousness and social discomfort.
✅ Solution: Managing stress levels can help reduce tinnitus severity. If tinnitus is making social situations harder, tinnitus treatment may offer relief.
5. How can I stop a panic attack in a social setting?
Social anxiety can sometimes escalate into a full-blown panic attack, leading to symptoms like a racing heart, dizziness, and breathlessness.
✅ Solution:
- Grounding techniques (e.g., focusing on an object, using the 5-4-3-2-1 method)
- Slow, deep breathing to activate the body’s relaxation response
- Reminding yourself that the moment will pass, and you are safe
For further guidance, check out these quick tips for anxiety attack relief.
6. Why does social anxiety sometimes turn into anger or frustration?
It’s not uncommon for social anxiety to cause irritability and self-directed frustration. When you feel stuck—unable to express yourself or engage socially—it can lead to internalized anger or resentment.
✅ Solution: Learning healthy coping strategies can help process these emotions constructively. CBT for anger management can be beneficial for those struggling with these feelings.
7. Can past trauma contribute to social anxiety?
Yes! Many people with social anxiety have experienced past bullying, criticism, or embarrassing moments that shaped their fears. In some cases, social anxiety and PTSD overlap, making it harder to feel safe in social situations.
✅ Solution: Addressing the root cause through therapy can be life-changing. If past experiences still affect your ability to engage socially, working with a PTSD therapist may help process these emotions in a safe, supportive way.
Breaking Free from Social Anxiety: Small Steps, Big Changes
Overcoming social anxiety isn’t about forcing yourself into uncomfortable situations overnight—it’s about small, manageable steps that build confidence over time.
If large social events feel overwhelming, start small. Say hello to a neighbor, make eye contact with a cashier, or practice ordering coffee with confidence. Each tiny action rewires your brain, showing it that social situations aren’t as threatening as they seem.
A great way to track progress is to keep a journal. Write down your small wins—whether it’s speaking up in a meeting, making a phone call, or attending a social gathering. Seeing these victories in writing reinforces growth and motivates you to keep pushing forward.
The Role of Self-Compassion in Social Anxiety Recovery
Many people judge themselves harshly for feeling nervous in social situations. But here’s the truth: You’re not alone, and you’re not failing.
Self-compassion is a powerful tool in recovery. Instead of beating yourself up for feeling anxious, try speaking to yourself the way you would to a friend. Would you criticise them for struggling, or would you offer support and encouragement?
Therapy can help shift these deep-rooted negative beliefs. Working with a therapist provides structured guidance, proven techniques, and a safe space to practice new ways of thinking.
The key to progress? Keep going. Each step forward—no matter how small—is a victory. And when you’re ready for professional support, book a session online and take that next step toward confidence.